Over the last couple of years I’ve been learning that God delights when we come to him with expectation and anticipation. I think our tendency is to come to God with a shallow hope, like a peasant coming to a king hoping the king will grant his request. But the reality is God is our abba (daddy), who loves to bless his children in ways that works out for our best interests. When we pray from a position of faith and expectation, when we pray from a position of joy in what God is going to do, it is his very nature to respond with love and joy. And when you come face to face with the living God, we should expect amazing things to happen.
I went to Prayer and Praise tonight with high expectation; I was looking for joy and peace. There is currently a potential for big changes to occur within our family (related to foster care), and although I feel I clearly know what God would have us do in this situation, I wasn’t feeling any joy in it and that was messing with my peace.
God met me exactly where I was. There have only been a few times in my life when I can say I felt the manifest presence of God to the point of physical stimulation. I count myself blessed for those moments. The first one occurred when I was struggling with my faith. At a time when I was ready to turn my back on God completely, God simply put his hand on my back. In that simple touch I received tremendous peace, and although I had already been confirmed, this was the day I received Christ. My life turned at that moment.
Tonight I was seeking God. The circumstances are entirely different, but I was seeking that touch of peace that I had felt before. If you seek, you will find.
Tonight it felt like God wrapped his arms around me and gave me a big hug, the same kind of hug that I love to give to my children when you squeeze them to the point of contorting their bodies just a little bit. I felt God’s touch. It’s not quite the same as a physical touch, though I have heard some people give testimony that they felt a physical touch when nobody was there. But it was a spiritual touch that crosses over into the physical ever so slightly. I could feel the position of his arms, and the nuzzling of his head against my mine, and goose bumps all over. It was what I was looking for.
Then God told me this: “What you’re feeling right now, this is what I want you to do for my children. Embrace them, hold them. Show them how much I love them. Don’t worry about anything, I’ll take care of the rest.”
There you go. Confirmation. Peace, but not a passive kind of peace that allows you to sit on your fanny. Joy that I can take rest in the fact that God promises me that he’d worry about the details and provide everything we need.
Okay God, I’m in. Your will be done. I love you too,
Nate
Your description of God’s Touch was so very compelling. I, too, have had those moments, indeed, days where his manifest presence is as strong as sitting there with HIM and enjoying His touch and be able to look at his face and, especially, His eyes that consume with with His everlasting, unimaginable, intense love that communicate over and over again: “I love you so much. I love you so very much. I want you to know me more and more each moment. Give me your heart and your will. I need you to give me all your love…” as my eyes are flowing tears of love and my body is held in a paralyzing hold similar to moments of intense emotion, but much more so. I long for that again and I will be there again, but as I continue life in the same throne room, but maybe not reclining with Him as I did. Taking my life as a believer with His Word and His Love and living close to Him all the time. We can, as the body, be and do as He did and was.